


All I Want is You

by tessagray_herondale_carstairs



Series: Hell or Glory [2]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Christmas, Comfort, Fluff, Grief, Hurt Keith (Voltron), Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Police, Police AU, everyone tries to help keith but he's a mess and so am i, shiro does scrapbooking, uhhh so it's 2am and i wrote this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-21
Updated: 2017-07-21
Packaged: 2018-12-05 00:13:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11566323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tessagray_herondale_carstairs/pseuds/tessagray_herondale_carstairs
Summary: The whole precinct is having a rough time after Lance.





	All I Want is You

**Author's Note:**

> IT'S NOT EVEN CHRISTMAS. But it is 2am, I'm emo, and so this just kinda poured out of me. Please excuse any mistakes, it's unbeta'd. My heart hurts. I'm so sorry. Super spoilery for my other fic, Hell or Glory. Please read that before reading this!!

The Christmas after Lance died, no one in the precinct knew what to do. It was always Lance who organized Secret Santa, Lance who set up the karaoke nights and potlucks, Lance who invited people without families to his own family's celebrations. The atmosphere in the workplace was tentative, and sad. Every time Hunk walked into the break room, every time he saw the bulletin board that would've been‒ should've been‒ filled with Lance's flyers, he had to keep himself from crying.  
  
So even through it broke Shiro's heart to have to replace Lance, he took it upon himself to lighten the mood. He printed off some flyers‒ less flashy than Lance's, sure, but just as well. Posted them on the board. Nothing as amazing as what Lance would've come up with, just a simple Secret Santa list for sign ups. He wasn't expecting many people to partake in it. It was, after all, something that felt like it belonged to Lance. That since he died, it should die with him. But Shiro knew Lance would've wanted the tradition to continue; it made everyone so happy.  
  
To Shiro's surprise, nearly everyone in the department signed up. Pidge, Hunk, Allura, Coran, from their group. Keith hadn't. There was a simple dot on the very bottom of the list, as if someone had pressed the pen to the paper and then stopped. It felt like it was waiting for something, someone, to come back and finish their thought. Maybe it was just a stray pen mark. But Shiro didn't think so.  
  
He grouped the people and split them off in pairs, secretly slipping in Keith's name as well, but pairing Keith with himself. Shiro didn't want a gift, exactly, since he was the one organizing it. But he wanted to give Keith something. Hope, maybe. An opportunity for the family he'd been missing since Lance's death. He didn't know what he'd get him, but Shiro was sure he'd manage.  
  
It wasn't much, but suddenly the squad was smiling more. Pidge stopped hiding in the basement. Allura left her office to come talk to Pidge about the latest CES expo and the new lines of technology being rolled out. Hunk didn't have to try to stop himself from crying so much. It felt... better.  
  
The only one who didn't change was Keith. He still sat at his desk, sometimes staring into space, more often than not leaving early to run errands he would mumble under his breath. It hadn't been that long since Lance died, so Coran was keeping him on a very light caseload, simple things, yet Keith could barely focus on his files long enough before tossing them aside, growing as impatient with himself as he'd been as a teenager.  
  
Shiro'd tried talking to him, but Keith always brushed him aside. Allura set up meetings with the police psychologist, but Keith skipped them and gave flimsy excuses. Coran once tried to have an intervention, to help Keith face his grief, like he'd seen on TV, only to have Keith burst into tears and flee from his apartment. After that, everyone let him keep to himself.  
  
But as the day for Secret Santa reveals loomed closer, it seemed like everyone was buzzing about it. Who had whom, and who had already bought the gifts? Shiro had forgotten to put a price limit, so it was really anybody's game. He knew Pidge had already bought her gift, and Hunk's was being shipped to him, but he didn't know what to get Keith. How to give him something that would make him feel even a modicum less sad.  
  
The day before, Shiro was deleting old emails when he remembered The Email. An email chain Lance had sent around while Keith was still training with him, snapped pictures of Keith with filters as he was looking in a different direction, encouraging people to send their own random pictures in‒ "Keith related, preferably, but I'll take blackmail of anyone," he'd said before adding in six million emojis and a selfie of himself in the dog filter.  
  
Shiro went downstairs to the copy room, and printed out each and every photo of Keith that had been passed around. Some from Pidge as Keith gave her the finger, a couple from Hunk of Keith peering over Lance's shoulder at the file, but mostly they were all from Lance. Sometimes Keith was even posing in them, a smile forming on his face as he stared directly into the camera. Those were the emails that Lance had put heart emojis in, more gusto than usual.  
  
He bundled the photos into a scrapbook, clumsily doing his best to make it nice but not really knowing how arts and crafts worked in the first place. Shiro felt awkward holding the delicate pictures in his large hands, smearing glue on pages and hoping he didn't get any on the printed photos. It was messy and had Shiro swearing like a sailor nearly a minute into it, but he figured Keith wouldn't mind.  
  
After work, after everyone had given out their gifts‒ Shiro knew Keith didn't know he even had a Secret Santa, so he wanted to wait-- he walked up to Keith, absentmindedly packing up his things and staring off into space again. Shiro held up the scrapbook.  
  
"I'm your-" he cleared his throat, nervous, "I'm your Secret Santa." What if Keith yelled at him, like he had at so many people before? What if this only ended up breaking Keith more?  
  
Keith took the scrapbook with a blank face. He thumbed through it, and his expression barely changed: an eyebrow raise of surprise and a mouth twisted down as if in pain.  
  
"These are from an email chain Lance sent out a while ago. He wanted to show us a picture of you he took on the sly, but it turned into a constant thing. I think you know he took some pictures of you, but I don't think you ever knew the extent. So. The extent."  
  
Keith looked torn.  
  
Shiro hiked his satchel higher up on his shoulder. "Merry Christmas, Keith."  
  
Keith set the scrapbook on his desk with a loud thump, and he sprang forward, wrapping his arms around Shiro tightly.  
  
"I miss him so much, Takashi," he said, his voice breaking. "I-I, I don't know what to do anymore."  
  
Shiro hugged Keith back, and mussed up his hair, some tears escaping his own eyes. "It's okay. It's okay to miss him."  
  
Though they were alone in the office, it felt like someone was watching them, an angel, maybe; one with a wistful smile and mischievous eyes, one crying along with them, out of happiness that things would start to piece back together. 


End file.
